You Must Learn to Empty Yourself

Throughout our lives, if useless things accumulate and cling to us more and more, it’s like being a backpacker— the further we travel, the heavier the burden we carry, and consequently, the more we suffer. In times of suffering, we are unable to accomplish anything. Therefore, while reaping the rewards in life is important, it is also essential to know when to clear ourselves.

Clearing Others’ Standards

Why do we sometimes feel so restless and miserable? It’s because we tend to judge ourselves according to others’ standards, regardless of the circumstances or right and wrong. In fact, we are all independent individuals. Even though we cannot completely isolate ourselves from the outside world, the pillar of our spiritual world should be determined by ourselves. This means that our lives, work, emotions, and similar matters are all our own. With this understanding, we can form our own opinions and, with those opinions, we can have our own persistence. Living as a person means finding our own direction in life, learning to timely clear the external clamor, and then promptly excavating our inner thoughts and continuously moving forward based on those thoughts. Haruki Murakami wrote in “Kafka on the Shore,” ‘There is a sadness that cannot be cried away, a sadness that cannot be explained to others. Even if it could be explained, they would not understand.’ He also said, ‘Not all fish live in the same sea at the same time,’ so even if we desire understanding and support from others, it may not be granted. Therefore, when we understand how to clear others’ standards for ourselves and even comprehend that there are some insurmountable differences between people, we can adhere to our own standards, accommodate others’ standards, and clear away unnecessary standards. This way, our inner selves will not be so exhausted, and we will not be constantly influenced by others’ evaluations and opinions. Writer Camus once said, ‘For happiness, you must set aside the question of how others see me.’ In life, each person only has this one life; by living for oneself first, one can then live for others. If we constantly follow others’ standards from start to finish and obey the path set by others, how can we live the life we truly desire?

Clearing Mental Clutter

The writer Yang Jiang once encountered a student who was constantly troubled, feeling entangled by some worries and melancholy. This not only made the student live in a state of anxiety but also led to various unacceptable situations in their studies. In such a life tormented by the trials of life and studies, the student increasingly felt miserable, as if trapped in an inescapable quagmire. However, when Yang Jiang heard about this, instead of getting excited or deliberately comforting the student, she simply said, ‘Your problem is that you think too much and read too little.’ The road of life, from the beginning to the end, from the most difficult to the easiest, is actually the same. Or rather, in this life journey, some people encounter many problems but are not burdened by them. They feel that no matter how capable they are, there are always some problems waiting for them to solve, and they may not be able to handle them. If they are blocked by current difficulties and then simply choose not to deal with them, or even constantly self-deny and harm themselves, then the days ahead will be difficult. Conversely, if a person encounters a problem and immediately deals with it, without needlessly blocking their mind or tormenting themselves with wild thoughts, then even if the problem cannot be solved immediately, they will not rush to self-denial or self-blame because these actions are of no use and only exacerbate the difficulty. When faced with a problem, clear your mind, find the cause of the problem, analyze its logic, and then strive to find a breakthrough. Over time, once this good habit is formed, worries will gradually decrease because fewer problems are encountered. Even if some problems still exist, they will not easily affect you. Tagore once said, ‘One night, I destroyed all my memories, and from then on, my dreams became transparent; one morning, I threw away all my yesterdays, and from then on, my steps became light.’ By abandoning the past, one can easily accept the new and embrace the present to seize the future. Indeed, by timely clearing mental clutter to make room for a happy life, we can enjoy the present and a beautiful life.

Returning to Simplicity

Everyone has their own emotions and desires, but those who achieve simplicity will have a broad mind. Only by controlling desires, clearing mental clutter, and dispelling evil thoughts from the mind can one seek truth, goodness, and beauty within. Only then can one truly settle down, control their own life. If one blindly pursues current desires or blindly follows the crowd for fame and fortune, in the long run, they will find that they have not only wasted their prime years but also missed many opportunities for personal growth. At this point, there will be no place for tears, no chance for regret. In general, life only happens once. If we do not cherish it from the beginning, we will not know how to treat life in the present. Even in the process of growth, we have not thought about or planned our own lives, but have wasted time without any goals. In this case, the only thing waiting for us is endless regret, pain, and despair.